


"In Exchange"

by farad



Series: The Phoenix Series [5]
Category: The Magnificent Seven (TV)
Genre: 3K Round-up Challenge, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-25
Updated: 2016-06-25
Packaged: 2018-07-18 04:27:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,132
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7299556
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/farad/pseuds/farad
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>for the Daybook prompt "#5 Vin/Any, Any: Rare and sudden as a desert bloom"</p><p>Set after "Wagon Train, Part 1" , Josiah and Nathan talk about . . . .things . . . .</p>
            </blockquote>





	"In Exchange"

**Author's Note:**

> UnBeta-ed, all mistakes my own

“I'm gonna find that son of a bitch and kill him!” Will Richmond stormed away from Chris and Buck, brushing past Josiah who looked – damned tired.

 

Nathan studied his old friend in the firelight, seeing the deep lines at the corners of his eyes and lips, the furrows in his brow. This trip was getting to them all, but Josiah had started out tired, maybe more tired than any one else. The Nichols clan had only been gone a week when the Judge had rolled into town and announced his need to hold a circuit court. That had led to another week of them trying to get the town ready for all the newcomers, then a week of hard work on keeping things in hand. The criminal cases had gone first and lasted longest – five days of the seven planned, a whole week. That had given them another weekend to deal with the people in town for the civil cases, which was another weekend of the wagon folk people being underfoot.

 

“That's Vin Tanner you're talking about!” JD countered, making to follow Richmond. But Chris reached out and caught JD's arm, drawing him back.

 

“Leave it,” he said quietly, for JD only.

 

“But that's Vin -” JD started, cut off quickly by Buck, who reached out and caught JD's other arm.

 

“He ain't gonna find Vin,” Buck said, easing JD along in a walk away from Richmond and away from them. “Let's you and me go check on the horses, make sure that everything really is all right and that Dickey O'Shea's boys ain't back.”

 

Chris shook his head, and Ezra said quietly, “You don't honestly believe that Vin would take her, do you?” Ezra was asking the question to Chris but Nathan saw him cut his eyes toward Josiah.

 

Nathan, too, was watching Josiah. He knew, though they hadn't talked about it, that Josiah and Vin had – something. But things hadn't been good between them in a while – well, since the whole Nichols thing. Nathan had spent too much time – a lot of it wasted – trying to keep those damned boys alive, and Josiah had been either with him or with that hellcat of a mother, Mrs. Nichols, who couldn't seem to understand that she was the cause of all the things happening to her family.

 

By the time they left, she had lost more boys than had lived, and she was still wanting to know why God had turned his back on her. Josiah had tried his damnedest, spending so much time with her that Nathan had come to worry for his friend's sanity.

 

In the time after, Josiah had spent most of his time alone, at least as far as Nathan could tell. Up until the Judge had put them all to work getting ready for his circuit court, guarding prisoners, tending to all the people in town, and generally trying to keep the peace.

 

“Hell no, he didn't take her,” Chris said shortly. “But that don't mean she didn't volunteer to go with him.”

 

They couldn't argue with that, of course, but the look on Josiah's face made Nathan want to try.

 

Ezra, though, was the one who spoke first, ever ready with a quick thought. “Whyever would Vin Tanner take a woman with him – especially a married woman?”

 

“Love can be rare and sudden as a desert bloom,” Josiah said softly, with the tone that he used when he was quoting something.

 

Chris turned and stared at Josiah. Even in the firelight, Nathan could see that Chris was glaring at Josiah with something akin to anger, and his words were sharp and clipped. “Horseshit. Love ain't got a damned thing to do with it – not love for that woman, anyway. He thinks he's protecting her from her husband, and he ain't feeling like he's rightly wanted at the moment.” His glare seemed to grow stronger, but then he turned away. He blew out a breath, as if blowing off steam, and walked away from them, and away from the path Buck and JD had taken. In the sudden silence, Nathan could hear the crackle of the fire and the flap of Chris' black duster as he walked.

 

Nathan leaned down and added another log to the fire. It was going to be a long night. In the distance, he could hear Will Richmond slamming things around in his wagon. Gerard, Mary's friend, was trying to talk to Richmond, his voice low and calm, but that just seemed to make Richmond more angry.

 

“I believe I will wander about,” Ezra said with a sigh. “Perhaps Buck is correct and this whole thing can be attributed to Mr. O'Shea – he did kidnap her once, perhaps he is trying again.” He said it with some optimism, and for a time, Nathan felt the same thing.

 

Ezra wandered off, leaving Nathan and Josiah standing at the fire. Nathan looked across at Josiah, noticing that his eyes were closed and his face was drawn tight.

 

They'd never talked about it. But maybe it as time for that to change. Nathan eased down onto one of the wooden crates that people had scattered around the fire as they had settled down for the evening. It had been a chore to keep everyone in one group, but Chris had prevailed – with some help from Ger\rard – by reminding them that Dickey O'Shea hadn't given up so far and there was no reason to think that he would now, just because they had arrived at the homestead. “Reckon Chris is right?” Nathan asked, waving a hand toward another wooden crate nearby.

 

Josiah opened his eyes and sighed. He looked at the crate near Nathan then he looked around, as if expecting there to be other people around.

 

“Just us,” Nathan said quietly, leaning forward. “So why do you think Vin's in love with Mrs. Richmond? That ain't like him. And from what I've seen for the past few months, I thought he was pretty well taken with . . . someone else.”

 

Josiah frowned and in the firelight, his eyes widened, as if he were afraid. Nathan knew that couldn't be right, though; in all the years he had known Josiah, he had seen very little that scared the man. “Why would you think that?” Josiah asked, and his voice seemed to catch, the words not quite clear.

 

Nathan took a few seconds to think about his answer – to think about how to put the idea into words. Part of him – a big part of him – wanted to come right out and voice what he believed: that Vin and Josiah were spending time together. Special time.

 

But Josiah still had the fear on him, in the tightness of his face, the wideness in his eyes, and even in the smell of him. It reminded Nathan of something from his past, of growing up as a slave, waiting at any minute for the master to find a reason to punish, to beat, just because he could.

 

For an instant, he felt a power he had rarely known before: the power to hurt someone with his knowledge. The power to hurt someone because he could.

 

It was gone as soon as he recognized it for what it was, leaving in its wake a guilt that made his stomach turn. And a guilt that made him wonder what kind of friend he was, that he would feel this sort of power over Josiah, a friend who had never looked at the color of his skin.

 

He drew a deep breath, getting his thoughts together. The words came slow but clearly to his mind. “Because Vin was happy. He ain't the sort of man to be unhappy, we all know that; he takes life as it comes to him, one day at a time, and he's content to live in that day. But this was more than being content. He was happy to be in the day. I thought for sure that he would pick up and leave after Chris killed Eli Joe, and I know for a fact that he thought about it. But something kept him here, something gave him faith in Judge Travis and the justice system. That ain't his natural way of thinking – and you know it ain't mine. Something – someone – talked to him and gave him that faith. And he wanted to stay.”

 

Josiah looked away, into the fire. “Reckon it was Chris,” he said, his voice low.

 

Nathan took a breath, catching the first words on his tongue before they took flight. Instead, he reformed them and said, “Chris would have gone with him, not stopped him. They ain't friends like that.”

 

And there was the root of it, the root of this whole talk. He knew, and he knew Josiah knew, that he was opening the door for Josiah to speak the truth of what was – a truth that Josiah knew Nathan already knew.

 

Josiah's face tightened even more and he looked away, as if he were looking for a way to leave. Nathan knew then what had happened and why – and how it had happened. That damned woman and her questions about God and about faith. They had forced Josiah to have to examine his own faith – and to confront the differences between what he wanted to believe and what his father's religion had believed.

 

“I grew up a slave,” Nathan said softly, as quiet as he could manage and still hope for Josiah to hear it. “I saw all ways of love on the plantations. We didn't have much in the way of choice, but we tried to do what we could – and to help those who had it, for as long as they could have it. You ain't gonna surprise me, Josiah, and I ain't gonna hold it against you. I reckon you're doing enough of that on your own.”

 

It was probably the last words that soothed Josiah's worry. He sighed, but the lines of his face eased some and he looked down at Nathan. After a time, he sighed again but moved to the crate near Nathan and settled his big body on it. “It's not what you think,” he said quietly, each word coming slow, as if he were pulling them up from his belly. “It's not about – well, it's not all about . . .”

 

As he couldn't find a word, Nathan murmured, “Bedding?”

 

Josiah winced, swallowed, then carefully nodded.

 

Nathan barely kept from laughing, keeping it to a smile. “You ain't that old yet, are you?”

 

Josiah shook his head, but Nathan saw his lips twitch, almost smiling. “No,” he said, “though times like this, I wish I were. It'd make this a hell of a lot easier.”

 

Nathan grinned, more so at Josiah's attempt at humor as anything. But the smile didn't last long as Josiah sighed and looked into the fire. His voice was very quiet as he spoke. “Chris is partly right, no way to argue it. I . . . well, I been thinking a lot lately about what I believe, and how it conflicts with what the Church believes. Most of the time, I am able to reconcile by ideas about what Jesus actually intended and what I believe, but the Old Testament – it's part of the foundation of the faith. You can't ignore it or pretend that everything in it was put to the side by the gospel of love and forgiveness.”

 

“True,” Nathan said. “There are some things, many things, that Jesus didn't address at all. Don't recall that he said much about the different ways people love, though. Seemed he was generally a believer that more love in the world was good. Seems to me, too, that we spent a long while tied up with a woman who spewed a lot of hate. Hard to remember the good things about love with all that hate eating at your soul.”

 

Josiah leaned forward toward the fire, propping himself on his knees. In the distance, Nathan saw Will Richmond coming out of his wagon, his rifle in his hand. He pushed Gerard away when the other man tried to stop him and they exchanged some words that were hard for Nathan to hear clearly though Richmond's intentions were clear even in the dark and at a distance.

 

“You think things would be different if we hadn't been spending so much time and effort on Mrs. Nichols?” he asked, watching Richmond walk away from Gerard and toward the horse line.

 

Josiah sat for a time, staring into the fire before he answered. When he did, it wasn't so much an answer as one of his long ramblings and Nathan had to work to get the point out of it. “The ideas behind the Ten Commandments – not stealing, not killing, respecting your elders – all of those ideas form the basis of society, of how people live together and make civilization. The Old Testament is just one of the places that we find them; they are the core of Buddhist belief, of Hindu belief, of Muslim belief – though that one is also based in the Old Testament. They are foundations of all modern societies. The fabric of our civilizations are based in the things that one must do to live well with others. Forgiveness is a part of that as well – but that forgiveness comes with the understanding that for society to survive, then everyone has an obligation to honor it, a roll to play.”

 

Nathan held up a hand. “Are you talking about Vin and Mrs. Richmond, and him breaking a commandment?”

 

Josiah shook his head. “I'm talking about what's expected of us, Nathan, the role we all play in the greater scheme of things, God's plan. Man's role is to marry and have children, to honor his family and his God. The Commandments are for that – to preserve the family, the basis of the society. The basis of the faith.”

 

“Is that what you told Mrs. Nichols? That she destroyed her family by not honoring the Commandments?” He stared at Josiah, wondering where this was going – as he so often did with his friend. But he also wondered where Vin fit into this – or if this was a way for Josiah to argue that he didn't.

 

In which case, hell yes, Chris was right. And Josiah was a damned fool.

 

Josiah sighed and reached up to rub at his eyes. “I had no idea what to tell her,” he said tiredly. “And I think that's the problem. I have no doubt in my heart that she's wrong – no mother should let her own sons die in the name of vengeance. But . . . “

 

Nathan knew where this was going. He had been down his road a lot as a young man, when people, even his own people, used the Bible to justify their enslavement.

 

“Do you believe, in your heart, that all people are equal?” he said, measuring his words. “Do you believe that the color of skin, or what one believes, or the language that one speaks – do you believe that God sees all of that as equal?”

 

Josiah snorted. “You know that I do.”

 

“Then why would you question the rest of this? You yourself believe in the New Testament and the peace that Jesus offers to the world. You've told me this more times than I can recall. So why is this woman making you question that?”

 

Josiah sighed this time and shook his head. “Don't guess it matters at this point,” he said softly. “He's gone and she's gone with him. He deserves to be happy, Nathan, and he deserves to have a woman who loves him.”

 

Nathan shrugged, certain of his next words. “He deserves to have someone he loves, my friend. But I don't think it's her, any more than Chris does. Or you. You know Vin better than that.” He pushed up from his seat and moved to stand close to Josiah. “You might ought to read the section where Jesus and the Devil talk, in the desert. You know how the Devil can twist things around, make anyone, even Jesus, second guess his own beliefs. Mrs. Nichols certainly had some ideas that no mother should have, and I'd be willing to say that she corrupted the words of God for her own purposes.”

 

Josiah stared into the firelight. “You may be right, my friend. But maybe we need to think of the bigger picture of things, the role of family, the need for stability. Maybe Vin's doing what we should all be doing – settling down. Don't you feel the need to see Miss Rain again soon?”

 

Just hearing her name made his stomach flutter a little. “Yeah, I reckon so. But you think about what makes you happy, Josiah. Sometimes it's as simple as that.”

 

Josiah sighed again. Nathan patted him on the shoulder then turned away. “Gonna be a long night. Think I'll try to sleep while I can.”

 

As he walked away, he heard Josiah whisper very softly, “ _Since you are precious and honored in my sight, and because I love you, I will give people in exchange for you, nations in exchange for your life._ ”

 

Stretched out on his bedroll, staring up at the stares, he thought about Rain; he'd seen her at the village after that new marshal had run them all out of town, and it had rekindled the flame he had for her. Maybe Josiah was right, and it was man's responsibility to settle down, make families, hold thing together. Maybe Vin had felt a need stronger than what he felt for Josiah.

 

Maybe that was why even Ezra was putting down wagers on who could successfully court the widow and her boy, making it sound like he'd marry - though Nathan suspected that Ezra wouldn't. He wasn't the marrying sort, either, not even for money.

 

Well, maybe not. Now that there was the chance for gold . . .

 

Chris seemed to be keeping a close eye on Ezra, though – Nathan had heard them talking as they walked the perimeter of the camp, keeping an eye on things. He couldn't make out their words, but he had heard the irritation in Ezra's voice and the tiredness in Chris' which usually meant he was putting his foot down on some scheme of Ezra's – probably this one with the widow.

 

Chris had enough to deal with, if Vin had run off with the Richmond woman. Just what he needed right now, while he was still getting over losing Sara's pa. To lose a friend, too.

 

Nathan hoped that they were all wrong and that Vin was on his way back to town, waiting for them to return. Waiting for Josiah to return.

 

 

 

 

 

_Note: Josiah's quote is from The Bible, Isaiah 43:4_


End file.
